I don't know about you, but when I have time to relax, time to sit back and completely chill without anything else on the agenda, that's often when the fretful thoughts sneak up and start gnawing on me. When I soak in a bubble bath, or try to take a nap, or have a quiet dinner with Michael my mind often turns to, "What about that? And what about this? And what about that?? And what about this?? And, dear Lord, what am I going to do about that?!?"
It robs me of peace, and it professes my lack of faith in the Lord. It's very difficult for God to be heard clearly, and consequently obeyed when I'm focused on picking apart problems, difficult issues, and troubles.
I want to do whatever the Lord wants me to do, without pointing out all the obvious hurdles in the way. I want to follow Him willingly without Him having to put a bit in my mouth to shut me up and force my head in the direction we're going! I want that obedience to come without fear or worry, knowing full well that the Lord has been before me to make the way!
However, the true me is so stubborn! Whenever something new is on the horizon, I worry. Somehow I think that maybe God doesn't have all the details worked out, and I need to figure out how the difficulties that will surely arise must be handled! I need to make a plan, and write a check list, and start ticking off each item. I need to research, and find the best options, and work out the solutions.
We got home Saturday night from lovely Santa Barbara, and it truly was such a delightful field trip away for a few days with the kids. We walked about 5 miles on Friday, and about 8 miles on Saturday along the harbor, the wharf, up and down State Street, the waterfront bike path, East Beach, and Montecito. We checked out the Mission, played at the pool and the beach, and had a great time just toodling around town.
But, I started fretting while we were gone about a few things that are coming up soon that I know will be challenging. For instance, knowing that I'm losing my helper, Briana, now that she is engaged and planning to go out into the mission field once they are married this summer, has been stressful. Just thinking about having to find someone new makes my blood pressure shoot up. And yet, I know that the Lord has it all perfectly planned, and that worrying in advance, and sweating the details doesn't do a thing except prove how little I understand His great Love for His children!
I feel like He said to me this weekend,
"Don't fret about anything. I am in control. Just trust Me."
I want to be change in His pocket to be spent any way He wishes.
Thank You, Jesus, for this message today from Experiencing God Day by Day by Henry T. Blackaby & Richard Blackaby (for March 31st):
God never sends you into a situation alone. He always goes before His children, as He did the children of Israel when he led them with a cloud by day and a pillar of fire by night. You do not serve as His advance troops in a foreign and hostile situation. He always precedes you in any situation you encounter. God is never caught by surprise by your experience; He has already been there. He is prepared to meet every need because He has gone before you and knows exactly what you will need for your pilgrimage (Deut. 31:8).
Not only does God go before you, but He also stands beside you and behind you, to provide protection and comfort (Ps. 139:7-12). Jesus knew His disciples would be totally bewildered by His crucifixion, so He assured them in advance that no matter what happened, no matter where they went, they would go in confidence that He had already gone before them. Paul, too, experienced this assurance (Acts 18:9; 23:11). In the most bewildering circumstances, his Lord was there!
If you are going through a difficult or confusing time, know that your Lord has gone before you and He is present with you. He is fully aware of what you are facing, and He is actively responding to your need. There is nowhere you can go that you will not find Christ waiting for you to join Him. Even when you face death, you can be assured that He has gone before you in triumph. As a child of God, rest in the knowledge that your Savior preceded you, and He will walk with you through each experience of your life."